He fires first – a round that clips my torso as I dodge away from the lockers. I narrow my eyes and squeeze off two rounds – both hit him cleanly in the chest, just up and to the left. He dies more slowly – sputtering for life as I quickly return to my search. I remind myself to be systematic as I peer into the dark locker, gripping the wound at my side. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Two rounds from the SOCOM – another old one falls on top of his rifleman friend down the hall. No. No. Nononononono. No. No. FUCK. I think for a moment, dip two fingers under the laces of my boot, and remove a small silver key. Goddamnit. I head for a particularly dark stairwell. Pressing myself into the deepest shadow I can find, I pull out the plastic baggie and open it, licking the tip of my pinkie. I dip my pinkie into the bag and encrust it with powder, close the bag, close my eyes, and slip the pinkie under my tongue. It’s been too long. It’s too intense. It’s way too intense. It’s not safe.. There was a crew of latecomers standing along the back wall. We had our mix of old timers and new faces. Most of the group members had grabbed the front row seats. After the secretary started the meeting, John took over. He briefly qualified but you could tell that recovery had changed him. You could tell that he was finally comfortable. He was looking people in the eye.When the speakers took to the podium, the crowd went silent. For the next hour every ear was on them. They shared their stories. One had been a waitress, another a lawyer, and another a prison guard. They told what it had been like, what brought them to the halls and what things were like today.Still, I could tell that there was something fishy. Something rubbed me wrong. Folks like that usually come in different shapes and sizes. These were linebackers.As John ended the meeting, the walls went gray.In a voice that seemed so unlike him, John spoke to the crowd, "Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is John K. and I am an.
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